We suffer so much because we feel that life and people need to be a certain way. We get frustrated and bewildered by not seeing things happening as we expected or wanted. Does this happen to you? What can you change? See here the importance of flowing with life.
The more we create expectations in our minds as to how people should behave and how things should be, the more we set ourselves up for suffering. The more you think your happiness depends on a combination of external events, the more you’ll experience pain based on the difference between reality and your illusion.
Life happens. Not only are there the individual desires of the countless trillions of life forms, not only are there the forces of the physical universe in play moving atoms and galaxies, but there is also the will of God, as those who have awakened to spiritual life perceive.
And in the middle of all this, you think you can control your destiny? Seriously?
So, we have to learn to flow with life. In China, we find the ancient concept of the TAO, the flux of life. The classic example is that of the leaf floating downstream. When the leaf hits a rock, what does it do? Does it try to break the rock? Does it get angry because a rock got in its way? No. It’ll just flow around the rock and on down the river. You can do the same.
Your river is your purpose, your dharma. You flow through life living your purpose, putting in action your multiple dharmas as I explain in the book The 3T Path (www.3TPath.com/books). You learn to feel the flow of your essence and of living your values. Exactly where and how your life will flow doesn’t matter. The leaf does not care if the river turns to the left or the right, if it’s deep or shallow, fast or slow, nor what rock or log it’ll find in its way.
Life becomes much easier when you develop this ability to let things flow. Let those who need to enter your life, do so. And, just the same, let those who need to leave your life do so too. Understand that a “no” is just as good as a “yes”, because it’s just showing you which way to flow, which path you should take. A closed door is nothing more than a step towards the door you need to open.
Krishna greatly emphasizes this point in the Bhagavad-gita. Practically the most repeated instruction in Krishna’s teachings is the importance of developing equanimity. Equanimity means that you remain “equal” no matter what life brings you. You learn that everything external is just that, “external”, and you’re not affected by it because you’re inside, untouched by external events. What life presents you is only the backdrop for your existence, and the focus remains always the same: doing your dharma, in divine connection. Just, you remain unperturbed.
This really works. As long as you remain fixed in doing your dharma, the best of who you really are, you’ll experience satisfaction and peace, no matter what’s going on outside.
A note of caution: flowing is not spilling. Flowing has direction, has purpose. Spilling is dissipated undirected energy. When we’re running around starting things, only to quit soon afterward, not getting serious about anything… we’re spilling. A sentiment of frustration and confusion will pervade your mind because the action has no flow, no direction. This happens when we don’t know our purpose, our dharmas.
Give up expectations and focus on being who you really are. This means focus on your dharmas, on your deepest nature, and your values. Take on whatever life brings you as an opportunity to express the best of you. As a result, you’ll naturally experience an overall sense of clarity, peace and joy.
Watch my video on this topic here: https://youtu.be/C-rVTgIsUDY.
Look what they’re saying about The 3T Path book: “What a fantastic read.” – Mikey Serino
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